This Pain

This pain
Brings tears to my eyes from deep in my gut

I have never felt anything like it

And the horror of it

Demands I push it aside

I cannot look at it

I cannot allow these tears to spill

What if they never stop?

They tear though my chest

And rip apart my throat

I choke them back

Distract myself by writing words

Try with powerless determination

To stem the outbreak of them

A single tear

Escapes

And I begin to win the battle

 The pain subsides,

Sinking back into the quagmire

To the realm that I forcefully forget

As the tear dries on my face

Leaving behind in its wake

The deepening ache

And empty numbness that I cannot

Figure out how to quell

Or what to do with

This pain

© 2004  Moonfyre

Published in Nox - An Anthology of Dark Poets Against Abuse (Gromagon Press, 2006)

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